What I Do

Why Discuss Death, Dying, and Bereavement?

You may be wondering why I have created a website that focuses on death, dying, and bereavement. It is because of what each of us has ahead of us on our own life journey. Part of the journey before us is suffering through the death of people we love, and part is experiencing our own death. You might ask, “Why should I want to have anything to do with death, dying, and bereavement, I’m not dying or grieving? Besides, that’s morbid!” Based on my professional and personal experience, I think there are two reasons to openly discuss these topics: one is more philosophical, the other is more practical.

Introduction to My Counseling Services

I have two areas of counseling services: a private practice for individuals, couples, and families and a group practice. My private practice is for those grieving individuals and/or families who Prefer to meet with me by themselves, usually because of private matters they want to work on. My group practice is for those who want to meet others who have had similar experiences so they can give support and receive support from them.

Individuals and Families

INDIVIDUAL, COUPLES, AND FAMILY COUNSELING

The majority of my counseling is private, 60 or 90-minute sessions with individuals, couples, or families conducted in my office. My normal office hours in Austin are Tuesday through Friday from 8:30 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. Mondays are dedicated to working with those who have been impacted by ALS - patients, caregivers, and bereaved loved ones. In conjunction with the ALS Association Texas Chapter, I conduct sessions at the Association offices in San Antonio from 9:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m.

Introduction to Groups and Classes

Some people find that being able to share their experiences, feelings, thoughts, and behaviors regarding their loss with others helps them in their mourning. The mutual giving and receiving of support with others can be an important aid as they rebuild their world after a death. To help with this process, I conduct various groups targeting specific types of deaths.

H.O.P.E. Perinatal Loss

The experience of a perinatal loss is a significant event in the lives of parents and grandparents, often one that shapes the disappointing and heartbreaking chapters in their life stories. Since 2003 I have been conducting the H.O.P.E. (Helping Ourselves through this Perinatal Experience) Perinatal Loss Group, a support group specifically designed for those in the Austin and Central Texas area who have experienced a perinatal loss. HOPE provides a safe place for parents to discover their own answers to some of the questions that consume them following their loss, to help them make meaning of their loss, and, eventually, to find peace.

Loss of Child

Many people consider the death of a child, regardless of age, to be one of the most difficult losses to endure. It is not the normal course of nature - children are supposed to bury their parents, not the other way around. Since 2004 I have been conducting Loss of Child Group specifically designed for those in the Austin area who have experienced the death of a child under the age of 18. The group provides a safe place for parents to discover their own answers to some of the questions that consume them following their loss, help them make meaning of their loss, and, eventually, to find peace.

One Year Left

"Death destroys a man, the idea of Death saves him."
E.M. Forster

Since ancient times, we have been reminded that our physical existence on this earth is limited. From Socrates to the Dalai Lama, we are admonished to practice dying, prepare for death. All of the major religions teach that this life as we know it is not permanent and that we should prepare for what comes afterwards. In the Hindu tradition, the belief is that a person's death reflects one's life. A well-known example is the assassination of Mahatma Gandhi. After being shot in the chest three times and before he died, he repeatedly stated the name of Ram, the Hindu deity representing compassion, courage, and devotion to religious values and duty. As he died, Gandhi reflected the same compassion, courage, and devotion he had practiced during his life. He had prepared for his death.

Introduction to My Consulting Services

Responding to the Business Impacts of Leadership Loss

Most often, the attention regarding loss is focused on the individuals who are directly affected and his/her intimate relationships such as friends and family. This attention is certainly reasonable and justified. However, just like the old analogy of a pebble being dropped into a pond, the ripples created by the death of a person go far and wide. One place those ripples reach can be at the deceased's workplace. This section of the website reviews the various impacts on and possible responses by organizations that have had a key employee, or a key employee’s family member, suddenly die.

Organizational Matters

The death of an employee is analogous to the common metaphor of a stone dropped into a pond. When a stone hits the water, it causes ripples that spread out from the point of impact. As the ripples reach further out into the pond, their size and effect diminish until they are barely perceptible. Similarly, when an employee dies, that part (group, department, etc.) of the organization closest to the employee is affected the greatest. The further away from that deceased’s department/group/etc., the less the overall impact is. Extending the metaphor further, the higher in the organization the deceased was, the bigger the “stone,” the greater the initial “splash,” and the more far-reaching the “ripples.”

Personnel Matters

Other places on this site address the generalities of bereavement, grief, mourning, and dying. A workplace-related death, on the other hand, has unique factors that are not present in the usual discussions of these topics. What can be important to fellow employees of the deceased include the circumstances of the death, such as the suddenness and the place; whether the cause was natural, accidental, or intentional; the relationship of the deceased to the particular employee; and the role, tenure, and age of the deceased.